my eyes are stinging

i feel so sick,
wish i could just switch everything off so i didn't have to think anymore

can i just start again please?

old songs hold such memories for me

they make me sad about things that happened in the past
sometimes i feel like i didn't make the most of my college years
looking back now i realise how they good they were
i shouldn't listen to them because they make me so nostalgic
a land down under reminds me so much of the times up the hill with jake and tyler and the campfire going - nights up that hill were the best, i miss it, i miss the people
i need to stop this, the nostalgia is getting a bit too much

Feeling like rubbish

Fed up, down, scared, worried, numb, empty, shit
Missing him, wishing he was here
Scared he's not missing me
Scared he doesn't want me like he used to
Scared he wants other girls
Scared we're growing apart
One the verge of tears and feeling that way again
Need to go to bed before it gets any worse
Fuck this shit. I need to stop it and be stronger.
If he doesn't want me then it's for a reason
I need to love myself incase he doesn't. Otherwise i'll start looking for it in all the wrong places and i don't wanna be like that again.
Bed now please.

Turn a lamp on,

let me talk to you,

see that light bulb, does something to you,

makes it a little harder to tell a lie don't it?

makes it difficult to run and hide don't it?

tell the truth to me, good truth to me,

come close to me if that's you,

i wanna see the details inside of those beautiful eyes,

the lies.

now nothing holds significance and nothing holds relevance

here we go again...

ffs
just when i was starting to think how long its been since the last one